Dealing with Death

Hands clasping legs of a person dealing with death.

Photo by cottonbro on Pexels

Many people associate dealing with death as a part of being elderly. They believe that they will never die. They have not dealt with death and do not understand what dealing with death means. The truth is that we never know when we are going to die. Fortunately, we can be proactive in learning about what grief is, how certain people deal with grief, and what we can do to help people during this difficult time. The best way to learn about something is to become engaged.

The Realms of Grief

We must prepare our minds and bodies to deal with and identify different realms of grief. If you were about to embark on a long journey, you would pack the proper gear needed to depart. That is the preparation we must carry with us when dealing with the aspect of death as it comes into our lives. There are multiple realms of the grieving process that may not be present for everyone but are factors that may appear.

Emotional realm 

This realm deals with the shock, emotions, and disbelief of grief. We exist in a culture where cremation is prevalent, and a funeral is not always necessary. The lack of a burial disrupts the grieving process because there is less time to express your sorrow, anger, sadness, regret, shock, or depression in a group of people or amongst loved ones. We need to take the time to accept we can and will be feeling emotions and deal with them in the form of a life celebration or a funeral. This realm of grief is critical to identify because our circumstances should draw us nearer to those we love as an essential key to closure.

Physical Realm

This realm deals with sleep disturbances, fatigue, exhaustion, headaches, and body aches. Our bodies may be letting us know they feel distressed. We may be shocked by how much energy we use in response to a loss. Muscle aches, shortness of breath, heart palpitations, weight loss, or weight gain are ways in which the body can react to the loss of someone loved. At this critical time, self-care is vital. We must take proper care to note that this is only temporary and that our bodies will return to normal. It is a natural mechanism intended to encourage you to reflect and motivate you to take care of your body. We must remind ourselves to drink water, eat three meals daily, exercise and rest.

Cognitive Realm

The mental aspect of death elucidates mental activity that may cause us to be confused and affect our ability to think. It is not a time to talk about numbers, make rash decisions, or absorb information. You might find it helpful to suspend many of your thoughts and gravitate more towards catching up and processing a new reality. We must learn to take everything one thought at a time and ask simple queries like, “What do I want?” and “What is wanted for me?” Such actions allow us to get back to life. When in this realm, we should not put too much effort into deconstructing the world and focus mainly on taking time to think and feel through our calm.

Social Realm

The social realm of grief causes us to disconnect from the world around us. We feel like strangers in a strange land in a crowded room filled with friends. Some people do not want to leave home. Others have trouble with close friends. Some individuals struggle going to the grocery store because the deceased worked there. Other people have problems paying bills because their deceased loved one would handle all of the family finances. This realm can be challenging to undertake, but we must keep the focus on the greater whole. The bigger picture will help us return to the world of things and help us regain our footing in realizing that relationships and dynamics in our world can change, but it does not have to be the end of the world.

Spiritual Realm

The spiritual realm of grief is the bigger picture view. This realm involves questioning the spiritual, the meaning of life, and asking many “why” questions for many different ideas. The world may lack meaning at this point to many people, but we must ensure that we have conversations with loved ones.

Final Thoughts on dealing with death

We must learn about the realms of grief to be more comfortable dealing with death. We must face our inner challenges and remember we have a duty to ourselves and our loved ones. One of the most important things we can remember when dealing with death is not the type of protection or company insurance we have, but what we do remember is the peace of mind, the calm, and relief at getting a death benefit to protect us. We must become comfortable talking about death and comforting others dealing with death.

The ideas presented in this article came from National Life Group’s Breaking Barriers seminar on navigating grief.

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We hope that this information on dealing with death is insightful for you.

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About Jose Lerma

Jose has been a career agent working with Empower Brokerage since 2021 helping clients from all walks of life find tailored solutions for their healthcare needs. He is passionate about helping people fulfill their dreams and helping clients live a more empowered existence. 

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